I believe both are possible: socially or digitally enforced preference on self-revelation, and that it is the key to the points you are raising. I’m afraid we are locking into the later, and that social software show us how immensely socially complex is the world that we learnt to live in during our education.

Given the value of ‘context appropriate friends’ to each utility/site a user signs up to, how effective do you think Plaxo Pulse will be at ‘being the place to arrange those friends’ so you can then decide which network to drag to which site?

Making it as easy as possible to add a group of friends while at the same time not ‘spamming’ them with invitations is another interesting topic.

To avoid having to constantly accept invitations could it be possible for example that once you agree to be a person’s friend on Plaxo Pulse you then ‘pre-authorise’ them to take that relationship to any site of their choosing? But what happens if they choose a destination you don’t want to be associated with? Would be interested to hear your thoughts on this subject.